As society is having limited success in the return to normal, (see Chicago teacher strikes, Canadian Cruise Ship Ban, and Iowa reduction of Mask Mandate) I have observed an interesting truth. It is easier to “start something” than to “stop something”, even when there is clear evidence to the benefit of stopping. This reality is evident in private, public, and political matters. There seems to be no way to avoid the challenges associated with “stopping.”
Personally
I have dated an average amount over the years. It was always exciting to start a new relationship—the possibilities of an intertwined future filled with a life of love and companionship. The first few weeks of a new relationship are filled with exciting moments and high levels of euphoria. But then reality arrives, and the relationship must be able to support itself with comfort, compatibility, and a shared life view – all of these are much less fun than the sparks that initiated the relationship. Because most people average between 3 to 5 serious relationships before finding “the one,” nearly every person has experienced the pain involved in getting out of a relationship. I have yet to meet a person who enjoys the breakup, and most people are not good at ending relationships. See evidence of some of the worst breakup stories - HERE.
Professionally
The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics calculates that up to 20% of new businesses fail in the first two years, 45% fail in the first five, and 65% fail in the first ten. Now, these aren’t mom and pop sized businesses; these include multi-million dollar companies. Scrolling through a recent article, “202 of the Biggest, Costliest Startup Failures of All Time,” you can see some of these companies had funding levels between $300 million and $1.7 billion. Companies didn’t rack up these huge deficits by poor management alone. In a cramped board room, somewhere, sat a group of well-intentioned, passionate entrepreneurs who believed so much in their idea that they kept convincing others to continue in their support. These leaders couldn’t stop chasing their dream.
Politically
The United States still has about 2,500 troops in Afghanistan. The War in Afghanistan officially ended in 2014, but the United States continues to commit troops to this region. This year will mark the 20 year anniversary of having troops deployed in Afghanistan. The tragedy of 9/11 inspired our nation to take action to bring those responsible to justice. However, after nearly two decades, the challenge of “stopping” our Afghanistan involvement proves to be problematic.
Virtual Education
It is estimated that at least 76% of students are engaged in virtual education – either entirely virtual or in some form of hybrid education. The decision to launch into virtual school was the right decision in the Spring of 2020, but as more research becomes available, the decision to “get back to class” seems to be overly strenuous. Even with the following data points to support in-person learning, ending virtual education has been slow to eliminate:
· CDC says it is safe to return
· European schools are fully open and safe
· Studies show rare in-school transmission of Covid-19
Our brain is not wired for “ending things.” Humans believe they are “logical beings,” but study after study shows that humans are not logical. We struggle to end things because of a cocktail of powerful mental short-cuts that hijack our ability to think rationally. The following mental shortcuts induce our avoidance of stopping:
· ambiguity effect (we prefer what is known to us)
· anchoring bias (we rely on the first piece of information)
· availability heuristic (we believe things that happened recently are more likely to occur in the future)
· commitment bias (we support past ideas, even when presented with evidence they are wrong)
· confirmation bias (we interpret data favoring our current belief)
· framing effect (our decisions depend on how information is presented to us)
· The illusion of Validity (we are overconfident in our predictions)
· Illusory Truth Effect (we believe misinformation more easily when it is repeated)
· Loss Aversion (we prefer to avoid losses to acquiring equivalent gains)
· Negativity Bias (we feel negative events more intensely)
Any one of these heuristics can dampen your desire to “stop”, even if logically you know that stopping is exactly what is required. The question is how can we make stopping easier?
First, be mindful of your emotional levels as you enter situations. If high levels of emotion make you feel overly happy, overly excited, too fearful, or outraged, be mindful of starting that activity or engaging in that situation. Strong emotions draw you towards “starting” actions. It feels good, and creating something new usually makes people feel better. The best way to avoid the pain required in stopping is by never starting. Second, plan your exit strategy before you “start” the event. Pick some data-driven markers that can help trigger your decision to stop. Businesses struggle with this tactic and continue to chase revenue for years after ignoring obvious fiscal realities. Finally, communicate the exit strategy with someone who can remind you of your plan. This accountability partner can help provide perspective and clarity once you become clouded by the mirage of continuation.
“Stopping” will never replace “starting” as the primary catalyst, which is a good thing. If stopping were easier, we might never finish anything. “Starting” will always be more engaging, but we need to be aware of our avoidance of stopping. We need to be mindful of the difficulties “stopping” requires and plan to account for those difficulties. Albert Einstein said it best, “Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.”